Change Starts Here
I started this self-esteem blog to make women of color feel better about themselves. Too many of us settle for less because we don't think we can have it all. I hope these blog posts will help you realize you can have it all and so much more.
If you have any topics you think would be beneficial or questions, press the "ask" button above or e-mail confidencehappens@gmail.com.
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This week, I encountered two very different young women: one who refuses to settle for anything and another who is set on giving up her dreams. They are my inspiration for this post.
When I was 15, I decided that I wanted to be like Atoosa Rubenstein, the editor of Seventeen at the time. I wanted to devote my life to finding a way to reach young women and make their lives better, so they could become confident adults. I wanted every girl to feel the same rise in confidence I did when I flipped through Seventeen.
I still do.
It’s no great discovery that life is always going to hand you curve balls and that things will never be as easy as you would like, but you can’t give up before you even try.
I hate to hear people say they can’t do something, especially when it’s realistically in their grasp. The amazing thing about being a woman in American right now is that we can do anything. I can wake up tomorrow and decide to hitchhike to San Diego if I want (that’s a little dangerous, but you get my meaning).
If you start settling now, you will always wonder, “What if?”
What if you had ignored your boyfriend’s pleas to stay and taken that job in Seattle? What if you had moved to France for a year? What if you had taken the first train out of town and made a home wherever it took you? What if you had decided to pursue your dreams?
Those questions only breed guilt, sadness and resent toward anyone you let influence your decision-making. Those emotions can ruin your life.
It’s OK to be selfish sometimes. It’s OK to do what makes you happy. If anyone in your life isn’t happy for you, then you should reevaluate your relationship with them.
Don’t give up on your happiness; don’t settle. As long as you’re not hurting anyone, you should be able to live the life you want.
Yeah, I’ll be pretty broke trying to make it as a journalist in New York City. Sure, I’ll be knocked down and there will be times that I just want to quit or settle for a position, but I won’t.
If I never reach my dream, at least I know I worked as hard as I could to get there. You should feel the same way, too.
Since life is so unexpected, you might ended up doing something you love even more.
The woman pictured above is Atoosa Rubenstein, editor of Seventeen from 2003 to 2006. She made sure Seventeen was more than a typical teen fashion magazine and literally changed my life.
